Smoking Ganesh Bidis Isn’t Blasphemous, Is It?

This news item is fascinating.

The government in the Indian state of Meghalaya has confiscated textbooks showing pictures of Jesus Christ holding a cigarette and a can of beer.

Presumably someone just grabbed a Jesus picture off the web and stuck it in the textbook without noticing that He was holding a cigarette and a can of beer.

This is excellent news, because it provides me with an opportunity to tell my Smoking Jesus joke, which I learned from Dee Wood about twenty-nine years ago.

Jesus is walking down the road, carrying his cross. It’s a hot day and he’s thirsty.

He walks by a Hovel.

Guy standing in front of the Hovel: “Hey, man, ain’t you Jesus Christ?”

Jesus: “Yeah, that’s me, man.”

Guy: “Hey, that cross looks real heavy.”

Jesus: “Yeah, man, it’s a real pain in the ass. Hey, you got some water?”

Guy: “Sure,” (gets a dipperful of water and hands it to Jesus)

Jesus: (leans his cross against the wall of the hovel, drinks the water) “Thanks, man.”

Guy: “No problem, Jesus. Hey, you want a cigarette?”

Jesus: “Sure, man, a cigarette would hit the spot right about now.”

Guy: (pulls out a packet of Raleighs, takes two out, hands one to Jesus, puts the other in his mouth. Strikes a match, lights Jesus up, then himself. They smoke for a minute.)

Jesus: “Yeaaaaah, man. That’s a good smoke. Love that wonderful Raleigh taste. Say, man, do you save the coupons?”

Guy: “You want the coupon? Sure, Jesus, that’s cool.” (Takes the coupon out of the pack, hands it to Jesus, who puts it in his pocket)

Guy: “Say, Jesus, I didn’t know you saved Raleigh coupons.”

Jesus: “Of course I save the coupons! How the hell do you think I got the cross?

This joke only makes sense if you remember this:

You forgot Andrew Jackson’s Big Block of Cheese with nary a macaroni in sight.

With my modern day perspective, the ad looks kind of funny and insane at the same time. I wonder, say, in forty years time, if the junk food ads of today would look equally insane to us.


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